(I wrote this little devotion the spring of 2020 – at the beginning of Covid (the quarantine). My church did a few zoom church meetings and then we went to parking lot church, kinda like a spiritual drive-in-movie theater! We tuned into the songs and the preaching through a radio channel. It’s funny – I don’t remember how we took the offering! Even though we’re four years out from the quarantine, I still think there is much to say about Thomas and his need for a physical encounter with Jesus.)
I admit that I’ve always thought there was something wrong with Thomas (John 20:24ff). He seemed less mature than the other disciples and he somehow came to be known as “doubting Thomas.” Not a nickname you would want to have for the rest of time. He wasn’t there when Jesus first appeared to the disciples, and he flat out did not believe them. He was bold to say, “Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails and place my finger into the mark of the nails and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.” Think about that for a minute. Can you believe anyone would say that about the Crucified Christ? That is definitely more than just bold – it’s downright impudent!
But I’m coming to a different perspective on Thomas. And I would say the “quarantine” has been partly responsible for it. I know we have our zoom calls or meetings, and we even have parking lot church. But one thing we lack – is touch – real life contact. I’m content to stay home, order my groceries online (or send my home delivery husband). I’m ok with Zoom – but one thing I miss – is the sweet touch of a friend or sitting next to my grandchildren at the table. I’m unsettled by “social distancing”.
Can you imagine the longing in Thomas that was made the greater because he held in his memory the rough yet tender hands of Jesus? He sat by him at table, he walked beside him – bumping up against him. He felt the hands of Jesus, kneeling before him, washing his feet. Thomas remembered Jesus reaching out to hug him; He was with Jesus when the woman reached out and touched only the hem of Christ’s cloak and Jesus exclaimed over the fact that he had felt power go out from him. – Jesus must have felt that in his body. And in Luke’s account of Jesus appearing to the disciples post-Resurrection he says to them – “Touch me and see. For a spirit does not have flesh and bones as you see that I have.” (Luke 24:39)
Jesus didn’t have to appear to the disciples post Resurrection. He could have easily simply walked away from the tomb and gone to be with the Father. But I think one of the reasons he came and ate fish and bread with his friends is he knew that as bodies with souls we need the physicality of touch. Even though he gently rebuked Thomas for doubting he let Thomas touch his side and hands. In fact, he initiated the contact. No shame, no angry rebuke. He admonished him for the way he believed but from where I sit, it seems as if he knew that some people need that physicality, and others do not. And so, after 40 days with his dear friends, Christ ascended and now sits next to the Father with a body – forever incarnate, eternally honoring and blessing the place of the body in the world to come.
So as Christians with bodies – let us practice Resurrection by blessing others with a holy touch, an incarnate hug, a loving glance. When this quarantine is over – let’s greet each other with a holy kiss. We can do this not out of our own hunger, but by the fact that the Resurrection of Christ has forever hallowed the body. Let’s practice Resurrection by asking the Spirit to use our bodies to bless and love others.
This is a quote from an email I received a few days ago. The writer overheard this at a retreat near the end of Lent, and it stayed with her.* I would say it has stayed with me as well.
She writes about the disciples in John 21 – where, sometime after they had seen the resurrected Jesus, Simon Peter says, “I am going fishing.” And the others decide to join him. Such a simple story – “And they went out, and got in the boat, but that night they caught nothing.” (John 21:3) Jesus has appeared to them, but they weren’t called back into the kind of life they had had together before Christ was crucified. So, it seems like they have simply gone back to the life they had before.
I think we might all identify with this sentiment as we think about moving on from Easter “back into normal life.” There was a structure to Lent that does not seem obvious today; there was a movement, a journey that for many of us ended with Resurrection Sunday. But does it? Is that the best of what we are offered to do with our post-resurrection life? – to go back to what we know?
I’ve been reluctant to review the fasts I had kept (or mostly kept!) during Lent; only in that I am leery of saying – oh I was successful here, and not so successful there. At best I can say- oh this helped me in my journey, and this- not so much. There are ways I fasted that I want to hold on to. As a result of (mostly) staying the course during Lent, I feel freer to be more intentional about the choices I make now.
I’ve added a reflection moment to our weekly reviews and confessions – an encouragement to be more intentional about asking the Spirit where we experienced or saw the power of the resurrection in our day/week. But without anything to really hang our hats on in terms of practicality – simply asking the question doesn’t feel so helpful. It’s pretty vague. So, I’ve made a short list that might be helpful as a guide as we navigate our way into resurrection life.
We find resurrection power for
Personal holiness – using our bodies for Christian living.
5 For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. 6 We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. 7 For one who has died has been set free from sin. 8 Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. 9 We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. 10 For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. 11 So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. 12 Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions.
Romans 6:5-12
Sin no longer has mastery over us – even though we still struggle at times. Paul gives us a way through those struggles in Romans 8:10-11 – “But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.”
The “secret” (if you want to call it that) is to call on the indwelling power of the Holy Spirit. I wrote about this during Advent and used a quote from The Healing Presence for the Lectio quote for that week. Leanne Payne writes:
In Him we become fully human. In Him, we begin to do His works. This involves incarnation, a descent of the Spirit into our deepest beings and lives. In Him, the will, the intellect, imagination, feeling and sensory being are hallowed and enlivened. We begin to fully live, to participate in the eternal, the immutable, the indestructible.
Leanne Payne, The Healing Presence
Secondly, we find resurrection power –
for right relationships. We can love, serve, forgive, forbear those we are in relationship with. This means not only those whom we love, but also those whom we might see as our “enemies,” and all those in-between. At my church for a long time we had a phrase that would sometimes be used to describe people who were difficult to work with or to serve alongside with. We called them EGRs. Extra-Grace-Required people. (This is terrible I know… what a travesty as I look back on it). I’m sure there were people who considered me at times an EGR person – (I’m not just saying that… My impatience, my needs to control, my pride.. ugh).
We find such a good example of this in Stephen’s story in Acts 7. He is preaching a sermon and toward the end of it he accuses the religious leaders of betraying and murdering Christ. They come at him in great rage and the text reads: 55 But he, full of the Holy Spirit, gazed into heaven and saw the glory of God, and Jesus standing at the right hand of God. 56 And he said, “Behold, I see the heavens opened, and the Son of Man standing at the right hand of God.” (Act 7:55-56 ESV) He has seen the resurrected Christ. The crowd chased him out of town stoning him. But as he died, he lay there, crying out to God in a loud voice – “Lord do not hold this against them.”
Once again, the power to love, and forgive even our enemies can only come from the Spirit of God who indwells us. The apostle John says in 1 John 4:16 “So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.”
And finally, then, there is resurrection power
to be the Church, the body of Christ in formation, discipleship, proclamation, and practices.
“Christian practices are not activities we do to make something spiritual happen in our lives. Nor are they duties we undertake to be obedient to God. Rather, they are patterns of communal action that create openings in our lives where the grace, mercy, and presence of God may be made known to us. They are places where the power of God is experienced. In the end, these are not ultimately our practices but forms of participation in the practice of God.” (Craig Dyystra)
In Baptism, and in the Lord’s Table – we come to take our place in Christ’s death – and then in glorious victory – we rise to take our place in Christ’s own rising. For we know there is real power in the sacraments. – Whatever tradition you come from – know and anticipate that Christ through the Holy Spirit will make your hearts alive in the knowledge of God in both baptism and communion. When we live from that place of resurrection power – that is from the place of knowing that Christ indwells us – we serve better than we know; we teach better than we know; we make coffee better than we know!
15 For this reason, because I have heard of your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love toward all the saints, 16 I do not cease to give thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers, 17 that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, 18 having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, 19 and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might 20 that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places… (Eph 1:15-20 ESV)
Friends, I pray that as we consider these three ways to encounter resurrection power we might realize that we don’t have to “go back to what we know” – but to press on! To experience new life and maturity and good formation in Christ! May Paul’s prayer be ours:
14 For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, 15 from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named,16 that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being,17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith–that you, being rooted and grounded in love…
It is one thing to love sin and to force ourselves to quit it, it is another thing to hate sin because love for God is so gripping that the sin no longer appeals. The latter is repentance, the former is reform. It is repentance that God requires. Repentance is a “change of mind.” To love and yet quit it is not the same as hating it and quitting it. Your supposed victory over sin may be simple displacement. You may love one sin so much (such as your pride) that you will curtail another more embarrassing sin which you also love. This may look spiritual, but there is nothing of God in it. Natural men do it every day. Jim Ellif
Remember to take some time to ask the Holy Spirit where He revealed God’s goodness to you this week. Where did you experience the power of the resurrection? (I am working on another post that will help make this more practical).
Almighty, eternal God! Forgive us our sin and lead us to eternal life, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. Ulrich Zwingli
Begin by centering your heart in God’s presence… Give thanks to Him that you do not need to hide anything from him. Affirm that He is faithful and good, and his mercy and grace are “new every morning.” The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is thy faithfulness” (Lam. 3:22-23).
Now let Him begin the process of searching your heart. Are there ways you have not honored Christ this week? Where were your thoughts and desires not centered in Him? How have you failed in obedience to Christ?
Then, simply confess in as specific a way you can the sins that trouble you. Don’t rush through this process. Simply rest in God’s presence as He does this.
Now choose to let this go and receive Christ’s forgiveness for you. Remember – “He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9)
Receive His assurance of pardon – 7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, 8 which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight 9 making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ . (Eph 1:7-9 ESV)
And finally commit this confession to the Lord. As you rest in His forgiveness ask Him how to walk this out. Ask for the supernatural power of His Spirit to give you what you need to move forward. Thank Him that you “have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer [you] who live, but Christ lives in [you]” (Gal. 2:20).
Who is like a God like you, pardoning iniquity and passing over transgression For the remnant of his inheritance He does not retain his anger forever, Because he delights in steadfast love. He will again have compassion on us; He will tread our iniquities underfoot. You will cast all our sins Into the depths of the sea. You will show faithfulness to Jacob and steadfast love to Abraham, as you have sworn to our fathers From the days of old. Micah 7:18-20
Below you will find the lectio passage for this week; but I would encourage you to not only read this reflectively but take time to look at the context of this passage and then look for other passages in Paul that sound the same note. I’ve said this before (probably too many times!), Paul has taken the events of Christ’s death and resurrection, and made theology out of them! And then he makes that theology the language of our sanctification, our becoming in Christ. We can follow him in this as we read the Scriptures, identity the theological truths, and then let the Spirit form Christ in us through them. What a gift Paul was!
This is a fairly lengthy passage but it’s so good! It is probably a translation you might not be familiar with. May God “bring us to full knowledge of him!”
Ephesians 1:17–23 – May the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, give you a spirit of wisdom and perception of what is revealed, to bring you to full knowledge of him. May he enlighten the eyes of your mind so that you can see what hope his call holds for you, how rich is the glory of the heritage that he offers among his holy people, and how extraordinarily great is the power that he has exercised for us believers; this accords with the strength of his power at work in Christ,the power which he exercised in raising him from the dead and enthroning him at his right hand, in heaven, far above every principality, ruling force, power or sovereignty, or any other name that can be named, not only in this age but also in the age to come. He has put all things under his feet, and made him, as he is above all things, the head of the Church; which is his Body, the fullness of him who is filled, all in all.
Step One – Read the passage slowly, attentively. Allow yourself to be taken in by the words – pay attention to any word or phrase that strikes you in the passage. (If you haven’t studied this passage, you may find this first reading will stir observation questions in you – such as who, what when, where, how).
Step Two – Read it again. Meditate and reflect on the passage. What is it in your life that needs to hear that word or phrase? Sit in silence for a time, attending to the thoughts, images and impressions that begin to come to you. Turn that into prayer.
Step Three – What is God saying to you? What do you begin to feel called to?
Step Four – How does God want you to live this passage out? What are you resolved to do?
I hope you are remembering to pause during the week or during each day to reflect on where you experienced God’s goodness and his resurrection power!
We have ended the penitential season of Lent (for those of us in the Western church) and we can shift our thoughts and intentions toward the joy of what Christ has done in us and for us! We do not leave confession of sin behind us, but it seems appropriate to now add to our confessions the consciousness of the resurrected life. It can be as simple as intentionally taking time each day to reflect on the day we have had and ask God to show us where we experienced his goodness and the power of his resurrection. I don’t mean to imply that we should not have been doing that all through Lent, but now as our hearts turn toward new life we can shift our emphasis toward celebrating Christ’s resurrection power!
I’ve been using an app called lectio365 for prayer at the end of the day and I am enjoying it thoroughly! It’s spoken and there is a transcript of what is prayed alongside it. I had not realized before how powerful the spoken voice is but there’s something about it that deeply resonates with the hunger in my soul to hear the Father’s voice. In the nightly prayers, the readers encourage us to be conscious of the presence of God in our day in good and delightful ways. As well, there is a time to consider the sins of the day, and confess them to the Lord.
The prayer I’m writing below includes their brief nightly prayer of examen. I’ve added the part about resurrection life.
“Reflecting on the day that has passed, Lord, show me where you were at work in my life. In what ways did I experience your goodness and where did I hear you speak?” Lord, in what ways did I experience the power of your resurrection – whether in thought, word or deed?
I am not sure I could answer these questions even once today! I need the repetitive nature of the practice that then trains me to see what I have not seen in the past. Repetition teaches me to be aware of God’s presence throughout the day. I’ve made a commitment to do this daily until Pentecost Sunday (May 19, 2024).
I’m reminded of a set of resolutions that Clyde Kilby, a beloved professor at Wheaton College gave his students. Many of you are familiar with these resolutions. I believe what Dr. Kilby was trying to do with his students was to help them look up and out of their painful and over scrupulous introspections. This is what he wrote:
I shall open my eyes and ears. Once every day I shall simply stare at a tree, a flower, a cloud, or a person. I shall not then be concerned at all to ask what they are but simply be glad that they are. I shall joyfully allow them the mystery of what Lewis calls their “divine, magical, terrifying and ecstatic” existence.
What I love about this is that Dr. Kilby asked his students to look up to see the true, the good and the beautiful. This is so appropriate for resurrection living! You might ask – what in the world does this have to do with the resurrection?? Good question, I would say! I’ll answer that in a moment!
Paul, an apostle of the Resurrection – never separated the resurrection of Christ from his crucifixion – In almost every account in his letters, when he would speak of the efficacy of the Cross, he would follow it or precede it with a word about the power of Christ’s resurrection. Take a look at Philippians 3:10 – 10 that I may know him and the power of his resurrection, and may share his sufferings, becoming like him in his death… (Phi 3:10 ESV)
“Paul views the cross and resurrection as two inseparable parts of one great movement of grace, in with God deals with human sin and [enmity] and so reconciles humanity to himself.”
Ian Paul ~https://www.psephizo.com/biblical-studies/pauls-understanding-of-resurrection-i/
We see this of course in the sacrament of baptism and in the sacrament of Communion. In baptism we go down into the baptismal waters as Paul says in Romans 6:3-7 – taking our place in Christ’s death, dying to our sins. And then in verses 8-13 of this same chapter – there is this glorious rising where we rise out of the waters having been set free from sin! A friend put it this way – “if the resurrection had not happened, we would have drowned in those baptismal waters!” And of course, we do this in the Eucharist – and then actually every time we confess our sins and go on to receive Christ’s forgiveness. It’s a death and life world for us!
Resurrection life means that sin no longer has claim on us! Paul goes on in chapter 8,
“If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.”
Romans 8:11
Because Christ rose – the Holy Spirit now lives in us and gives us grace to live the new life we have been given! And that new life is nourished in us by practicing the presence of Christ – and by loving the true, the good and the beautiful. Sin has a grip and will have until Christ returns again, but it is not a death grip! Incarnational power leads us into freedom – God does the work, yet we must cultivate it through obedience, and grace, and love.
In many of our church traditions we are very familiar with the benefits of the Cross – forgiveness of sin, a right standing with God, freedom from the power of sin and death. Yet, we (I) struggle with owning and naming the power of the resurrection. Part of that is because, again in my evangelical tradition, we have holy week, Good Friday and then Easter – and then we’re done. Phew! In coming to love the rhythm of the liturgical calendar, I so appreciate that this time is now a season. Eastertide! And we have the leisure and grace to explore what resurrection life really looks like!
To return to the question above – what in the world does the resurrection have to do with loving the true, the good, and the beautiful? I would say – new life, a fertile heart, a new understanding of the body, and now being immersed in Christ’s life, death and resurrection gives us (as Anne of Green Gables said) “scope for the imagination!”
I’m leaving you with a quote from Dostoyevsky (which I have doctored somewhat) – “the infinity of the human soul–having been revealed in Christ and capable of fitting into itself all the boundlessness of [the risen Christ] –is at one and the same time both the greatest good, the highest truth, and the most perfect beauty.“
8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
As we turn our focus from the bright sadness of Lent and the wonder of the Cross, I pray that in this season to come we will move more deeply into what it means to live a resurrection life. We know it is not the life the prosperity gospel preaches, but if you are still with me, lets take the next 40 days (until the Ascension) and explore what Resurrection life looks like!
One element I would like to add to the regular practice of confessions is to consider any way, large or small, where we experienced Christ’s resurrection in our lives. In our time from Advent until now we have taken one day in the week to confess our sins. But I think now, it would be so good to include this added practice, even more often than that. Perhaps, before going to sleep each night , in whatever prayers you do, take the time to let the Holy Spirit to show you those moments of resurrection life you experienced or witnessed. I typically pray compline before I go to bed and I have found many resources that help me do that. I can give you resources if you’d like, or if you have ideas, share them here as well!
We might consider taking one of the passages in Scripture that emphasizes the Resurrection and memorize it. Certainly there are many we can both study and use lectio divina as ways to go deeper into Scripture.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy, he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. Though you have not seen him, you love him, and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls. 1 Peter 1:3-4a, 8-9.
“The proof that God raised Jesus from the dead is not the empty tomb, but the full hearts of his transformed disciples. The crowning evidence that he lives is not a vacant grave, but a spirit-filled fellowship. Not a rolled-away stone, but a carried-away church.” Clarence Jordan
In many traditions of the Church, today marks Holy Saturday – sometimes known as Easter Vigil. In all four gospel accounts this day is mentioned as the Sabbath between the Crucifixion and the Resurrection. After Christ’s body is removed from the Cross Joseph of Arimathea is given permission by Pilate to bury him. In a few of the gospel accounts the women (Mary Magdalene and the “other” Mary) start preparing the spices and oils which will be used along with linen cloths to wrap his body. In the John account (John 19) it is actually Nicodemus who does this. But before the preparations are completed the Sabbath begins. And so the ritual is not completed.
I think it’s significant that there is this moment between two of the most profound aspects of our Christian faith. We know from the Apostle’s Creed that this is the day Jesus descended into Sheol. Remember all of the disciples thought Christ’s death was the end of it. Most of them had abandoned Jesus in his greatest hour of need. There was no vigil for them that Sabbath night. They gathered to grieve, to weep, to mourn the death of their dream. Not one of them seemed to remember what Jesus had said to them about his death. In the Mark account he predicts his death in three passages (Mark 8:31-33, 9:30-32, and 10:32-34). In those same passages he predicts his resurrection.
In many ways, Holy Saturday is a time of suspension. Hanging between the Crucifixion and the Resurrection it is neither fraught with grief or fraught with hope. It’s an in-between day. But I think we’ve all had our holy Saturdays – those seasons in our lives where we feel in limbo – perhaps even between death and life. A loss, a death, a marriage, a miscarriage, a job, a parent… Have you ever thought about those days between the Cross and the Resurrection? Why. Did God need that? Did we need that? For the disciples how ashamed most of them must have been. To abandon Christ after all they had experienced with him. And how confusing it would have been – to walk with the King into Jerusalem less than a week ago to being stunned by what happened at Golgotha.
Our own holy Saturdays can be a time when we cry out to God. I think we are given permission to bring to Him the tension of those struggles we have. It could be a time to sit in the many psalms of lament in the Scriptures (Psalms 4, 35, 79, 94, and so many more). The cry of our heart might simply be “How Long, O Lord”. I recently did a study of that phrase and was very surprised at how often it came up. Psalm 13:1 – “How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? God invites us to bring to him all that is in our heart – even our doubts or fears or pain or struggles.
It is also a day of Sabbath rest – even more than a time – it’s a place of rest, where we might suspend our own struggles to simply find rest in God. Where we might remind our hearts that God is faithful. “But I trust in you, O Lord; I say you are my God” (Psalm 31:14). Most of the laments in the Psalms begin with sheer honesty – and yet end with trust.
As the preacher said – It’s Friday but Sunday’s coming! Our Christian Hope is established on Friday and fulfilled on Sunday! And in the meantime – there’s grace to rest, to be in God’s presence, to abide in faith. We all need Holy Saturdays – because in the testing of our faith we are told by Peter – “after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen!” (1 Peter 5:10-11).
What can one say? How do we even begin to grasp the import of this day for us? It can compare to no other day in the life of the Christian. I spoke tonight at our Good Friday service and used Mark 15:33-47 as the text. I went through the text but ended the talk with what I’m including below. This is such an intimate day, a life-changing day, I had to describe it as if I were there. I know that all of us cry out to see the Crucified Christ in life-changing ways. We know, though, that only the Holy Spirit can reveal Him to us. May it be so this night.
As I prayed about the message tonight, I thought about what it would be like to actually be there. At Calvary. So I did just that. I found myself at the foot of the cross. And this is what I saw, and this is what I heard. Maybe this is what He wants for all of us.
I am standing at the foot of the Cross on the hill of Calvary. I can only cry out to God, let this be done quickly, please… I am terrified of this darkness and of the quaking of the earth beneath me. It has lasted so long – but I am afraid to leave. I cannot leave. And then his voice. I heard these words that I didn’t even really understand – Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachtani. I know it though – from the words of the Psalm. What does it mean? I cannot grasp it all, but I hear it as the cry of my own heart – “Why oh why have you forsaken me?” I have been left in my sin, and my shame, and even in my suffering. I have been spat on, hit, cursed, and oh the pain… Your Word, Lord comes to mind again – you too were despised and rejected by others; you too suffered. Could all this around me be the fulfillment of your word? Even though you were struck down by God – was that for me? Did you take on my pain, my sin? Can it be that by your wounds, I am healed?
“oh to see my name… written in the wounds…”
– O that you would rend the heavens and come down, that the mountains might quake at your presence – as when fire kindles brushwood and the fire causes water to boil – to make your name known to your adversaries, and that the nations might tremble at your presence.
Later I find out – that in that time of darkness, that while the earth shook and the hot winds blew, the veil had been torn. From top to bottom it has been ripped! What does that mean? – Only the holy ones can enter it – surely not I or even my Lord. – But – oh yes! It is torn! The holy of holies is now open – wide open to receive me! To receive the world! If the world would only accept it.
I look around me and see the crowds… those who mocked but there were some who wept. I see a group of women standing apart from the crowds. They are the ones who weep. But where are the others? Those who followed him, those who were his friends.
I cannot leave, but I cannot watch – to see that sour wine pressed to his lips. And then… He died. He breathed his last breath – oh how I wish it were my last breath. It is finished.
They come for his body – but even then, I don’t want to leave. I am tethered to this place- this place of the Cross – for that is what it has become. I see now what I know I could never see on my own. I see that heaven is not only Christ centered, it is Cross centered. I see that my only hope in life comes in being tethered to this Cross. How could it be? That this horrific death could set me free? “oh to see my name written in the wounds… For in your suffering, I am indeed free.
It’s growing brighter—on the darkest of days – the sun returns, the clouds lighten, the wind dies down and the earth is quiet. I do not know what lies ahead, but in this place – I stand. I feel my heart settling down. – My grief is so great, but there is yet a peace. You, O Lord, bore wrath meant for me, you took the blame, you became sin for us, sin for me. And can it be that I stand forgiven? Oh – the heavens cry out that even with all else lost, there is yet, even on this dark good Friday, the enduring, even eternal power of the Cross.
