repentance

Love of Another Kind

We are completing our picture of repentance with a word on the last desire or virtue from the last Sunday pre-Lent. Forgiveness is the virtue – and one way of seeing it is as the desire to lay down our arms; to make a cease-fire; to turn the other cheek, to bless and honor our enemies. While what I’ve read of these preparations for Lent haven’t grouped them in any hierarchal order, they do seem to build one on the other.

If our first foray into repentance and preparation is a desire and hunger for God and His righteousness, then what follows in respect to the second desire makes sense. We long to be what God calls us to be, we thirst for His presence and His righteousness. We take our rightful place in relationship with Him and as a result in right relationship with each other. We accept that our repentance will carry with it the virtue of humility. And then from that place we know that we must make our way home from the far country of our sins. Repentance then takes on the deep desire to go home, to make peace with our Father and leave behind all that was destined to ruin us. Contrition is the virtue and regular confession of sin is the practice that keeps that repentance fresh and rich.

The fourth desire is love – the kind of love that shows mercy – not just occasional mercy but steadfast mercy, steadfast love. The Old Testament calls this “hesed” – and when attributed to God it reveals itself in faithful, long enduring, loyal mercy and steadfast love and goodness. Here mercy is not the opposite of justice, it is the pouring out of our lives in service to others because we want to be like Jesus, and because we want to give back to him what He has so generously given to us. Thomas Hopko says that “having mercy is God’s most distinguishing characteristic. Pouring out His mercy, His steadfast love, upon His covenanted people is His main characteristic (The Lenten Spring, p. 62). It’s easy to see how this virtue follows the others – we hunger for God’s righteousness, which means we accept our place in relationship with Him, and we long to live contrite and holy lives. Our reach then extends beyond our love of Him and goes out toward our neighbors and beyond.

The fifth desire signals a movement toward a radical place in relationship to others. This picture of repentance is truly “love of another kind.” Forgiveness. That’s it. One word. But probably the hardest thing we will ever do (or have ever done). I’m not talking about offering the olive branch of peace to someone who has owned his/her debt. I’m not talking about being able to forgive because we know they didn’t really mean it. I’m not talking about uneasy truces. I’m talking about a way of life that is absolutely impossible without the grace of God, without the power of Christ within. Every one of us will probably have at least one enemy – they might even be a beloved enemy. But we live not only in a broken world, we also live in a world where debts are held onto, where anger seethes beneath the surface, and bitterness carries the day. We might be able to clean up the way we talk to our enemies, but unless we intentionally lay down our arms, we will not know this “love of another kind.”

C.S. Lewis spent much of his life wrestling with forgiving others. He wrote in a letter shortly before he died, that he had finally forgiven a cruel schoolteacher from his early years. I’ve often wondered about the passage in Matthew 18 about forgiving someone 70 x 7 times. I used to think it meant that the one who sinned against me did so 70 x 7 times and each time I was supposed to forgive them. But in my own journey of healing, I have realized that it’s very possible I am called to forgive the same sin over again. I hope you know I’m not talking about being afraid we haven’t forgiven – I’m talking about the layers of unforgiveness that I may have harbored without even knowing I’ve done so.

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Matthew 18:21-22 (ESV)

Lewis says this: “To be Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you. This is hard. It is perhaps not so hard to forgive a single great injury. But to forgive the incessant provocations of daily life- to keep on forgiving the bossy mother-in-law, the bullying husband, the nagging wife… how can we do it? Only I think, by remembering where we stand, by meaning our words when we say in our prayers each night ‘forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us.’”

I find it interesting that the only sin mentioned in the Lord’s prayer is the sin of unforgiveness. Our capacity to receive God’s forgiveness is directly related to our capacity to release and forgive our enemies. Unforgiveness is ugly – and we really don’t want to see that kind of ugliness in ourselves. There is one person in my life (well there are probably more, but one sounds like I’m an ok person) that I struggle to forgive. I know I still struggle because when they are mentioned in conversation, I get a little excited when I hear bad things about them. Ugh.

Forgiveness is love of another kind. There are sins so grievous that there is no way we can forgive without the power of the Holy Spirit. Many of us won’t know or experience that kind of evil. But most of us have had people in our lives who turned their backs on us, slandered us, held grudges, or even envied us. There is a part of the Sermon on the Mount that is so hard to read, much less put into practice. For me, I would rather read verses about God’s love for me, like John 3:16. But… Jesus says: ³⁹ But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. ⁴⁰ And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. ⁴¹ And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. ⁴² Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you. ⁴³ “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ ⁴⁴ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, ⁴⁵ so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. (Mat 5: 39-45 ESV)

I would say that this kind of love – this unqualified forgiveness is the pinnacle of repentance. It completes the cycle. If repentance is a jewel, fashioned by God and our obedience, then these five desires reflect significant facets of that jewel. I want to be that kind of person – one willing to yield to the work of God in my heart and in my life that shines forth the kind of repentance that attracts others. Will you join me?

Advent One – Lectio Quote

Under the spiritual practices tab I wrote about Lectio Divina, which is a way of reading Scripture that goes beyond knowing about the Scripture to receiving it “into our bones” through reading and reflection. One way to approach this is to read it, reflect on it, respond to it, and resolve to listen to God through it. Charlotte Mason puts it like this – we bite, we chew, we savor, and we digest. We can do this in reading Scripture and we can also do it with other forms of reading (or listening or even viewing – Lectio Visio is a real thing!). Obviously, these other practices don’t hold the authority of Scripture but they do yield great wisdom when we slow down and take in what someone else has created!

We bite, we chew, we savor, and we digest.
Charlotte Mason

I have discovered this new way of reading through keeping a commonplace book. I have done this for years, mostly through typing passages from books I’ve read, etc. into my OneNote app. (Which I love!) But I discovered commonplacing quite by accident at the beginning of this year and the person who filmed the YouTube video I watched challenged us to write these out by hand (I have terrible handwriting). I found that as I slowed down to write or copy a passage out, it stayed with me longer, and was legible as well! My commonplace books have really helped form my understanding of Christian formation and the Church calendar. So each week, I have selected a passage from what I’ve been reading that fits our theme for the week and now want to encourage you to take it and “bite, chew, savor and digest!” I may include at some point some of my other meanderings into commonplacing so that you reap the benefit I’ve received as well! This week’s quote comes from John Shea and is more lengthy than I will probably do in the future. But I love what he says about repentance!

“The more deeply one enters into the experience of the sacred the more one is aware of one’s own personal evil and the destructive forces in society. The fact that one is alive to what is possible for humankind sharpens one’s sense that we are fallen people. The awareness of sin is the inevitable consequence of having met grace… This grace-judgment dynamic reveals that the center of Christian life is repentance. This does not mean that the distinguishing mark of the Christian is breast-beating. Feeling sorry, acknowledging guilt, and prolonging regret may be components of the human condition, but they are not what Jesus means by repentance. Repentance is the response to grace that overcomes the past and opens out to a new future…

Repentance distinguishes Christian life as one of struggle and conversion, and pervades it, not with remorse, but with hope. The message of Jesus is not “Repent,” but “Repent for the Kingdom of God is near.”
John Shea, A Star is Rising: Advent Meditations

‘Tis the Season

I’d like to bring you on my journey to this place of Christian formation that is now becoming my home. I feel at times that I’ve come from a far country of a faith fairly stripped of scripted liturgy. I find no one at fault for this and I’m very grateful for my deep heritage in Evangelicalism.

When we first started observing Advent as the season which precedes Christmas at my church, I was probably the first to eagerly want to incorporate Advent, although I certainly had not considered what it all meant! I was so struck by the idea of preparing for Christ’s incarnation. It became a season of anticipation and expectation, especially as we thought about the incredible gift God gave us in Christ. I remember the first time I spoke about this was actually at our Christmas Eve service.

One of my favorite commercials from that year which aired during December pictured for me the essence of Advent joy. In the commercial there were three (maybe four) children seated on a couch in front of a fire. Their stockings were hung on the mantle above. The scene pictured their glee and unbridled joy at waiting for Santa to come and fill their stockings. Before long though they had fallen asleep, in the dark, with the smoldering ashes of an almost extinguished fire. Ah… the waiting… I can barely remember what the commercial was for – except on each child’s head was a headband bearing a flashlight! So as the night deepened and the fire dwindled – all you could really see were four flashlights glowing in all different directions as they fell asleep! I suppose the commercial was about batteries but for me it was about Advent, and excitement and waiting and the anticipation of miracle!

Advent is wrapped in mystery and part of what helps us hold on to that is the joy of anticipating the birth of the newborn king. “The sky is dark, there blows a storm…” These are the first words of a favorite children’s book for me (Father Fox Penny Rhymes), and it speaks to warmth in the cold, joy in that warmth, and peace in the telling. Early on, Advent represented to me the need to slow down, to find a way out of the commercialism and trivial celebrates; a time to really enter the mystery of Christmas.

It wasn’t until much later, in fact, in the last few years I would say, that I began to see the penitential nature of Advent. In fact, I was really surprised when I read that Advent was considered to be a time of repentance. It was much like Lent in that way, although usually with a different emphasis from Lent. Advent is indeed a season of expectation and joy, but it is also the story of our need to be prepared for the final Advent of our Lord. John the Baptist leads that charge. In all four gospels John is spoken of the “messenger who will prepare the way” (Mal. 3:1, Mar. 1:2). He helped people prepare their hearts for the coming of the Messiah by baptizing them for the forgiveness of their sins. His warning is clear: “Repent for the kingdom of heaven is at hand.” (Mat. 3:2)

Repentance distinguishes Christian life as one of struggle and conversion and pervades it, not with remorse, but with hope. The message of Jesus is not “Repent,” but “Repent for the kingdom of God is near.
John Shea

John’s message of repentance and preparation sings loudly of the first Advent of our King. But, its final verse sings of the second and last Advent: the return of that King to bring all of creation under His sovereignty and rule. John is saying to us, on the other side of the birth of Christ, to be prepared for Christ’s return. We do this in the same way John called us to in the time before Christ. “Make room for Him in your heart; make straight the paths; repent and turn your whole self, body, spirit, soul toward the imminent return of your Savior.”

Advent speaks of three comings – the first and the last have just been mentioned. But the coming that leads us to the capacity to repent and to persevere is found in the Coming of Christ into the heart of every person of faith.

Traditionally there are themes designated for each week in Advent – hope, peace, joy and love. I find it fascinating that two of these are actually fruit of the Spirit, (peace and joy) and two are virtues that only reach their full capacity of virtuehood (I know it’s not a word!) also through the indwelling Spirit of God.

I have chosen not to focus on these themes but to highlight four other themes. The first week is the story of John the Baptist and his call to preparation; the second week centers on the waiting nature of Advent. The third highlights another dimension of preparation and that is the need to be watchful. Matthew’s story about the 10 virgins comes to mind here (Mat. 25:1-7). The fourth week veers a bit off course because it also happens to be Christmas Eve and so I chose to focus on Christ as the God with us – Immanuel, and the joy there can be in our worship of Him as that God with us.

Many of us were raised in traditions where the significant Christian events were marked only by a single day in the Christian year. So, we have Christmas, Good Friday, and Easter, which were observed as the significant days that they were. Recently I’ve come to appreciate that these holy days are in fact a part of a season. It’s not just Christmas eve and then Christmas Day – but it’s Advent, and Christmastide, and Epiphany! This gives us time to really inhabit the Story and to give time and space, and worship to the significance of those seasons.

My friends who have been a part of sacramental churches may chuckle at my marveling about this. Yes, I came late to the party. So, indulge me if you will. I now see how this observance of the Christian year with all its seasons can help form me in my Christian faith. I have time to let the truth of the Incarnation and His Ascension, etc.… seep deep “into my bones.” My prayer is that you all, those familiar with the liturgical calendar and those who are novices, would find fresh joy as we take this journey together. I’m grateful that we are all pilgrims on the way. May God give us grace to inhabit the Story of our homecoming in Christ.